seeing those faded lights
by i see the spark
Summary: take a key and lock her up, my fair lady — When the most important memories are forgotten due to insanity. Austin/Ally. Auslly. Slight AU.


_seeing those faded lights_

* * *

**Summary: **take a key and lock her up, _my fair lady_ — When the most important memories are forgotten due to insanity.

**Prompt:** The sasusaku fanfiction _My Fair Lady_ and the song _Drops of Jupiter_ by Train.

**A/N:** I was reading that fanfiction and after reading it I was like…inspired to do a fanfiction with the same title but a different plot. So, I wanted to base it on _London Bridge i__s Falling Down_ you know because that's where the title came from and since I wanted to do a different plot, I had to research the original lyrics to it and one line caught my eye which is up above in the summary. Now, the only plot I can come up with is…the same as the original one. So I'm taking that idea and I am going to make it my own. Literally came full circle with this one. But anyway, there's differences to suit A&A and to make it my own of course and this is not a copy or anything like that. Sure the plot is similar but these days, who really can find an original plot that hasn't been done before? Believe me when I say I've read tens and thousands of fanfictions with the same exact plot and it doesn't bother me because writers use their own twist to it, so please don't think I'm copying or anything like that. Anyway, it just so happens this is one of the most unique plots one will ever come across but, we'll see how this goes. It's also so much darker than anything I've ever written like I know lately I've written a lot of dark theme fanfictions like _doesn't mean my heart stops skipping _and _waiting is wasting, for people like me_ but this is like ten times darker than that. I'm exploring new writing styles and genres so please bear with me. I'll explain the title at the end and there's info on some fanfictions I'm working on down below so check it out too!

**Disclaimer:** Standard disclaimer is applied.

* * *

The cold wooden floor creaked with an eerie sound that she can never get used to – no matter how long she's been here. Everything around her was white – white curtains, white bedsheets, white lamp, white table, white, white, white, _white_. She couldn't stand the sight of white because all she can recall, and all she sees in her mind, is the purity of this _clean_ white, tainted with blood.

A boy and a girl stood before her as she grins at them – a grin like _The Joker_ – gesturing for them to come into her solitude home. They take a careful step forward, before swallowing away their worries and their fears, and completely coming into the room. The girl, short with wild black unruly curls sat beside her on the _clean white bed_ and the boy, stood tall with his fiery red head, a few meters away from them.

She laughs – or cackles – as the black haired girl tried to reach out for her skinny pale hands. Swatting away the girl's hand, she backed away from her. Her eyes are wide with curiosity – and maybe insanity – and her lips quivered with an uncertain grin. She doesn't know what to think, or what to say, or who these people were. All she knows is, _she can't trust them_.

"Ally." The black haired girl softly whispers, again trying to reach out to her lost friend. But all she got back was a slap on the face as the brunette girl jumped out of the bed and towards the closet beside her.

There was a hard slam of the closet door and all she sees is black. She knows the room is painted white but the darkness made it all disappear. And _this_, this made her happy.

But the people outside were banging onto her closet doors, begging her to come out. They scream and plead, and try to knock open the door but it's no use. She sealed it tight as she stood back, grinning wildly to herself, happy to get away from such _crazy_ people.

_Of course, they're the crazy ones_ a voice would whisper into her ear, but she ignores it, like she always has – ignoring the _right_ side of her brain, ignoring the sane Ally; the Ally that still _remembers_.

"Ally, please stop. Don't do this to yourself." The girl from the other side calls out, but she ignores it, a little unsure if her name really was Ally.

_Ally. Ah-lee. Ally._

It sounded foreign to her tongue, that word, that name, and everything to do with that girl – whoever she was. All she can recall from that girl is being happy, so extremely happy, and okay. But that's not her, it can't be her. She's not _Ally _– she's crazy and totally, completely not okay.

"We know you're not crazy. We know you're not insane. We know you're okay and that everything you are right now is just one big crazy act to moving on. But please stop this now. You can't keep pushing us away, and you can't keep pushing yourself away. You _need_ to stop Alls, please." The begging continued, but she tuned most of it out. Instead, she grabbed the only things she could find in this small damned closet – hangers, shoe boxes, unused and dirty clothes – and threw it at the door, screaming, yelling and screeching.

"STOP! SHUT UP! I DON'T KNOW YOU WHOEVER YOU ARE! PLEASE GO AWAY!" She yells and thrashes all over the place, kicking against the plywood walls – she can see the white now, the little ray of light from the small gab between the closet doors made that possible – and punching the cold wooden floor.

After a few minutes, the voices outside vanished, and the little ray of light gone with them as well. She calms down and sits at the corner of her little closet, rocking herself back and forth, back and forth. And she's laughing. Her throat was scratchy and sore, and her whole body weak and tired – but she laughs on. She lets the little fit of giggles rack over her body as the wild and loud laughter filled the air around her. There were tears in her eyes and she doesn't know whether it's her crying or _Ally_.

**xoxo**

She hears a soft knock on the door, and she looks up from playing with her unpainted nails. The door opens and in comes a boy, somewhat familiar, with his dashing brown eyes, sun-kissed tan skin, and wind-swept blonde hair. He had on a playful smirk, yet there's a look in his eyes that showed nothing but all seriousness. He wore a white polo shirt, and she couldn't help but gag at the color.

"Hello, Allyson." He smoothly speaks, closing the door with his foot, and barging into her room to plop himself down on her bed. "I hear you refused to be called Ally."

"That name is tainted." She whispers, looking away, staring down at her thin and frail little fingers. "It's not me, it's _her_."

"Her, as in _you_?" He tests, and she just turns to glare threateningly at him.

"You're no one to me. You don't know me or anything I've been through." With all the power she can muster in her broken little frame, she pushes at him to get off her bed. But he doesn't budge. Instead, he grips her thin wrist – careful not to completely break her – and pins her down on the bed.

"I know that your full name is Allyson Marie Dawson. And I also know that…_you're insane_." He says, his face stoic with a little bit of guilt and shame. She tries to struggle out of his hold but he only tightens his grip on her.

"_Who are you_?" Ally – no, _Allyson_ – whispers breathlessly as she stares into his tantalizing doe brown eyes.

He doesn't say a word, but his breath fans over her button nose and plump pink lips. His hand slither under the pillow, and she has no idea what he's trying to do – until the very last second. Her eyes widen as she tries to pull him back but it's too late, his hands are out of her reach and within them he holds dry and crushed pills – _her medication_.

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!" She screams at him as she launches herself onto him, trying to tackle him down. But he catches her and just holds her thrashing body close to his.

"Ally, stop this." His tone was deathly and threatening, but it did not faze Ally one bit. After all, she was _too crazy_ to even tell the difference.

He throws her down on the bed, and climbs right up on top of her whilst she tries to push him back, trying to get him off her as she beats onto his rock-hard chest.

"Stop this! Go away! Who are you?!" She yells right into his face. She spits at him, and slaps him, but he does not move one bit. "What do you want from me?"

He could see her resolve weakening as the tears start to form in her eyes. Her punches became weaker until she finally decides to turn away and not look at him.

She was _ashamed_. Ashamed at the fact that this one boy, this _mere stranger_ could make her feel so helpless and weak, and break through all these strong four walls she's put up for herself.

"Please tell me who you are." Her voice was croaky and silent, but he heard her. "What do you really want from me?"

"I want you to stop tonguing your meds." He whispers, gently patting her cheek so that she turns to look him straight in the eye. She weakly obliges. "I want you to stop pushing away the people that care, and stop pushing away the truth the you fairly know well."

"I—"

"I want you to stop lying to us, and to yourself because Ally, we both know you're not crazy. You never were, and you never will be." His other hand gently touches her cheek on the other side, before he tucks in behind her ear those annoying stray strands of brown hair.

She's looking straight through his eyes and she sees nothing but a soulless boy that seemed to glow with determination. She swallows hard because she knows there's something not right about this situation. Yet, she couldn't tell what it was.

He starts to lean in and she finds herself not minding it at all. She, too, leans in and their lips meet for the first time in what seems like a long time. And she feels it – and she remembers him. The taste of cherry popsicles and pancake syrup all tied in with his minty fresh breath. The soft and gentle touch of his rough but subtle butterfly kiss, and the way his hand would roam around her entire body, coming in contact with her very sensitive skin.

But this didn't last long for she finally realized what she's doing – and more importantly, what _he's_ doing. And with the force of her heated anger and feelings of hurt and betrayal, she pushes him off with all her power, boring holes into his very figure.

"Why. The. Fuck." She growls at him, choking right after as she felt the small pill go down her throat.

"You won't take your meds the easy way. I only did what I knew I could do for what I know is right." He tells her nonchalantly, taking a small step forward.

"Fuck you Austin Moon. Fuck your very existence." She shouts at him, grabbing her nearby lamp and throwing it his way.

He dodges her attack quite easily, leaving the lamp to crash down onto the floor with it's light bulb shattering into a million pieces. This leaves the room a little dark with the dull gleam of the moon and the stars shining right through the window.

"Ally." He trudges towards her and she cowers underneath the covers of her bed.

"Please Austin, don't." She whimpers, hugging herself as he climbs on top of her. "I—I don't need you."

She can feel her eyelids going heavy, and a yawn threatens to escape out of her mouth. Her whole body felt limp and weak and she could not stop him from unveiling her from the shelter of her blankets. This meant only one thing – _the meds were working_.

"Ally." He softly whispers, leaning down on her. She closes her eyes tight and she feels him lace his fingers through her own. Her breathing is now heavy and she can barely feel his soft lips grazing a small kiss on her forehead. But she did, right before she completely loses herself into a dreamless state of sleep.

**xoxo**

She wakes up to the bright light beating down on her closed eyelids. But once she finally opens them fully, she sees that people, very unfamiliar faces plastered with concern and worry, stared down and surrounded her. She gasps and backs away, feeling a little overwhelmed.

"What, what happened?" She chokes out as everyone took small steps back to give her some room and some air to breathe.

"You finally took your medication yourself sweetie." A woman, tall blonde with long and silky curly hair smiled at her. She wore a long white coat and carried a clipboard around. She knows her; she's her doctor.

"What—what do you mean?" She stutters, gripping tight the sheets covering her.

"I knew you'd been tonguing your meds so I tried to find a way to get you to properly drink them. But, Inga said when she visited your room last night to bring you your nightly medication, she told me you drank it all and that really surprised me. Nonetheless, I'm so proud of you." The doctor smiles again and all Ally could do is look around her and watch the concerned faces turn into relief and happiness. She did not understand this one bit.

"What are you talking about? You sent Austin here to kiss me and make me take my meds." Ally forcefully asks, an eyebrow raised high up and the room filled itself with loud gasps and thick tension in the air.

"Ally, sweetie—"

"He came in and pinned me down on the bed and tricked me into kissing him so he could force me to swallow my meds. Don't tell me you had nothing to do with that!" She angrily shouts and grabs the lamp by her table to throw it at anyone who dares defy her. But shock ran course through her whole body and she dropped the lamp as she realized that it was _supposed_ to be broken. "What the—"

"Ally…" the black haired girl beside her placed a soft hand on top of her shoulder.

"Trish—"

"Austin's dead." The bomb was dropped and Trish, too busy trying to calm down her shaking friend, couldn't wrap herself up at the fact that _Ally_ responded to being called "Ally" with no hesitation and that she, called her Trish for the first time in ten months.

"No, no, no, you're lying. He was here last night." Ally starts to quiver as everyone's gaze turn to look down at her with pitiful eyes. "He kissed me and I—I felt his lips for the first time in a long time and hi—his touch was real, so _real_."

"Ally, don't you remember why you're here?" The redhead broke out of his silence as he came closer towards the two girls. He knelt down in front of Ally and took her hand in his. "The car crash? Don't you recall being there, and watching Austin die right in front of you? Don't you remember insisting he's alive – like you're doing now – ten months ago?"

"No I—"

And there it all came crashing down on her. Those faded lights that passed by like a blur as the impact dawned on her. She remembers his polo shirt – clean white polo shirt – tainted with pure crimson blood. And the broken glass and windshields and car lights all shattered all around her as she tried to bring Austin's lifeless body back to life. He was dead. _Austin was dead._

"NO! I DON'T BELIEVE YOU! HE WAS HERE HE—"

"Ally—"

"HE KISSED ME AND MADE ME TAKE MY MEDS! HE CAN'T BE DEAD! HE WAS HERE WITH ME!" Thrashing all over the place, she rips off the white sheets she sat on and threw the lamp and pillows everywhere as the doctor ushered everyone out of the room.

"Ally, sweetie—"

"DON'T CALL ME THAT!" She cries louder than ever before, turning upside down her bed and kicking at those white-colored walls and tearing away that white colored wallpaper.

And then, she laughs as she falls to the ground. She's laughing and clutching her stomach and hugging her knees. There's tears again in her eyes and this time she's sure it's from her hysterical laughing. Her crazed laughter echoes throughout the room, surrounding her and wrapping her up, protecting her from the lonely silence as the doctor closes the door.

"I'm sorry." The doctor whispers sadly. "We have to lock her up. She would be nothing but harm, to herself, and everyone around her, if she keeps going on like this."

"But doc— "

"It's okay." The doctor whispers as she took Trish in for a hug. "She'll be okay."

But they all knew she won't be.

* * *

**A/N:** Well, that's done. Was it a little too dark? Oops. Sorry. I'm really happy with this. I enjoyed writing it and, it was fun characterizing Ally in a different view. So, if you liked it, please review :) The title, I'll explain now, is a based on a line from the song _Drops of Jupiter_ by Train that goes like "_did you make it to the milky way to see the lights all faded_" and it basically outlines the "blur" of what Ally saw as their car crashed without them reaching their destination idk. It's up there somewhere in the fic. Anyway, a short little note here involving my other works. I want to say I'm deleting my fanfiction _stay by your side through the rain and shine_ because, I really hate it and I'm not satisfied with it at all. So, I **will** be deleting it. It was just a way for me to let out some pent up frustrations and feelings and it was really crap so I'm deleting it because I'm so over that now and yeah. So, this is my one week's notice before deleting it so, if you like it, save it or copy it into your notes or screenshot it before it's completely gone. Also, Math test is over so I'm going to work full on _The Hurricane_ now, yay. Watch out for updates on that soon and, watch out for more one-shots.


End file.
